Pompeii is poop.
First off let me say I am exhausted. I have had less than 2 hours sleep. Not for want of trying mind you, I lay in bed for like... way more hours than that. I don't know if it's the heat, the stuffyness in my room, or just the fact that for some inexplicable reason Italy and sleep do not come together, like, EVER, but I have barely slept since I arrived in this country. Unless I manage to get to sleep and then not wake up. In which case I can sleep all day. Which kind of keeps that crazy cycle going... grrr.
Anyhoo, that's why I'm both grumpy and headachy and why this post may be less than belissimo. And kind of skewed to the side of hate. So apologies in advance.
Pompeii. Yeah, so, you know the story right? There was a town that was taken over by the Ancient Romans back in like, I don't know. Something-or-other BC. So then they were Roman, I guess, although not from Rome. My audio guide thought that was important. Whatever. So then there was an earthquake, in like 60AD or something? Then they rebuilt the city, and in the midst of that a volcano explodes and they're covered in ash. Then some guy discovers it back in the C19th or something and is all like "You know what would be cool and not at all creepy and disrespectful of the dead? If I pour plaster all over these poor dead people's bodies so people from all over the world can come and gawk at their tortured last moments, forever captured in creepy white plaster. Awesome. I'll make a million lire", or whatever currency was here before the Euro made everything expensive.
So now the world has the ruins at Pompeii. Apart from a bar somewhere in the middle, it's pretty much a big town of ruins, half of which was incomplete due to the earthquake anyways. Over half of which is inaccessible. The maps of which appear to be really well laid out until you try to use them. Also, they never explain why there are no roofs left. They explain the administration system though, which is WAY more interesting. The audio guides are a total rip off and should be destroyed for the good of humankind.
It's hot, it's incredibly dirty/dusty - whatever, my feet were black. AND it's full of tourists just as annoyed by the ridiculous heat, expense, crappyness of guides and lack of actual objects. Coz, see, instead of leaving things where they were found so they'd actually make sense and be worth the €11 you pay to get in, they go and cart off anything vaguely interesting to Naples where they can charge ANOTHER €11 so that you can look at the treasures completely out of context, probably in dimly lit room and in no particular order. Needless to say Archealogica de Romany whatsit won't be getting another €11 from me anytime soon. Bastardos that they are with their crappy maps and crappy audio guides that don't take account of the fact that they randomly close buildings, parts of buildings, or entire streets without bothering to change any of the instructions/signs.
Okay, so I guess you're getting the message that I think Pompeii is over rated. Or at least a very patchy experience. I think if you had a decent tour guide who spoke comprehensible English and took you to the places where there is something INTERESTING (i.e. not just "this was a take away joint. It has bowls. Wow, look at the bowls") then you might enjoy it. Also, if you didn't go when it's hot and filled with other tourists. So, like, maybe the middle of January would work? I don't know. All I know is don't buy the audio guide from the main entrance and go in the crappy entrance somewhere in between where the audio guide map begins and ends, and then spend a half hour trying to find the start and the "black boards" (signs in black, not chalk boards that give a number of every house) that tell you which number to press.
Apparently there is a brothel, which is not to be missed, and lots of other male genitalia lying around that the audio guide fails to mention. Or at least tells you is in the wrong spot. "See the male member next to the pot on the left counter." Well I would, poncy English dude, if it was still there. But obviously it got carted away to Naples along with the rest of the interesting bits of this city.
So, um, yeah. As my good friend recently accused me of being, I guess I'm a bit biley. I got sunburnt, a glass of icy stuff was like €3 and I needed about 4, I got lost a lot (have I mentioned how crap I am with maps?) and managed to walk for ages without seeing anything with a black board or whatever. My feet got really dirty, which is like one of my pet hates, and the pretty gardens were off limits, so you couldn't even sit under a tree to imagine what it might have been like to live there. And I like to imagine. I would have been Esmeneia, a pretty servant of the great... um, dude... see, that's all I got to because I didn't get to sit under a tree.
The camping ground I stayed in was really good though - Spartacus or something? It's right outside the main entrance and I got a bungalow all to myself for the cost of a shit hostel in Rome - €22. If you have 2 people it's €14 each or something, and of course if you deign to camp it's cheap as pizza. Speaking of, the pizza at the campground was really good and only €4. Internet was expensive, but not monitored so you could pay your €2.50 for half an hour and stay on it for way longer. No gelato nearby though, unless you pay exorbitant ruins prices, which I did not.
Hmm, so there you go. It's totally doable from Naples, but I'd recommend staying at the campground so you have somewhere to wash your feet and get a beer once you're done.
Grumpy Librarian Out.
Anyhoo, that's why I'm both grumpy and headachy and why this post may be less than belissimo. And kind of skewed to the side of hate. So apologies in advance.
Pompeii. Yeah, so, you know the story right? There was a town that was taken over by the Ancient Romans back in like, I don't know. Something-or-other BC. So then they were Roman, I guess, although not from Rome. My audio guide thought that was important. Whatever. So then there was an earthquake, in like 60AD or something? Then they rebuilt the city, and in the midst of that a volcano explodes and they're covered in ash. Then some guy discovers it back in the C19th or something and is all like "You know what would be cool and not at all creepy and disrespectful of the dead? If I pour plaster all over these poor dead people's bodies so people from all over the world can come and gawk at their tortured last moments, forever captured in creepy white plaster. Awesome. I'll make a million lire", or whatever currency was here before the Euro made everything expensive.
So now the world has the ruins at Pompeii. Apart from a bar somewhere in the middle, it's pretty much a big town of ruins, half of which was incomplete due to the earthquake anyways. Over half of which is inaccessible. The maps of which appear to be really well laid out until you try to use them. Also, they never explain why there are no roofs left. They explain the administration system though, which is WAY more interesting. The audio guides are a total rip off and should be destroyed for the good of humankind.
It's hot, it's incredibly dirty/dusty - whatever, my feet were black. AND it's full of tourists just as annoyed by the ridiculous heat, expense, crappyness of guides and lack of actual objects. Coz, see, instead of leaving things where they were found so they'd actually make sense and be worth the €11 you pay to get in, they go and cart off anything vaguely interesting to Naples where they can charge ANOTHER €11 so that you can look at the treasures completely out of context, probably in dimly lit room and in no particular order. Needless to say Archealogica de Romany whatsit won't be getting another €11 from me anytime soon. Bastardos that they are with their crappy maps and crappy audio guides that don't take account of the fact that they randomly close buildings, parts of buildings, or entire streets without bothering to change any of the instructions/signs.
Okay, so I guess you're getting the message that I think Pompeii is over rated. Or at least a very patchy experience. I think if you had a decent tour guide who spoke comprehensible English and took you to the places where there is something INTERESTING (i.e. not just "this was a take away joint. It has bowls. Wow, look at the bowls") then you might enjoy it. Also, if you didn't go when it's hot and filled with other tourists. So, like, maybe the middle of January would work? I don't know. All I know is don't buy the audio guide from the main entrance and go in the crappy entrance somewhere in between where the audio guide map begins and ends, and then spend a half hour trying to find the start and the "black boards" (signs in black, not chalk boards that give a number of every house) that tell you which number to press.
Apparently there is a brothel, which is not to be missed, and lots of other male genitalia lying around that the audio guide fails to mention. Or at least tells you is in the wrong spot. "See the male member next to the pot on the left counter." Well I would, poncy English dude, if it was still there. But obviously it got carted away to Naples along with the rest of the interesting bits of this city.
So, um, yeah. As my good friend recently accused me of being, I guess I'm a bit biley. I got sunburnt, a glass of icy stuff was like €3 and I needed about 4, I got lost a lot (have I mentioned how crap I am with maps?) and managed to walk for ages without seeing anything with a black board or whatever. My feet got really dirty, which is like one of my pet hates, and the pretty gardens were off limits, so you couldn't even sit under a tree to imagine what it might have been like to live there. And I like to imagine. I would have been Esmeneia, a pretty servant of the great... um, dude... see, that's all I got to because I didn't get to sit under a tree.
The camping ground I stayed in was really good though - Spartacus or something? It's right outside the main entrance and I got a bungalow all to myself for the cost of a shit hostel in Rome - €22. If you have 2 people it's €14 each or something, and of course if you deign to camp it's cheap as pizza. Speaking of, the pizza at the campground was really good and only €4. Internet was expensive, but not monitored so you could pay your €2.50 for half an hour and stay on it for way longer. No gelato nearby though, unless you pay exorbitant ruins prices, which I did not.
Hmm, so there you go. It's totally doable from Naples, but I'd recommend staying at the campground so you have somewhere to wash your feet and get a beer once you're done.
Grumpy Librarian Out.
posted by NomesD at 5:51 am
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